The Masked Singer cannot be stopped; The Masked Singer will not be stopped.
The Fox reality singing costume competition revealed its latest reveals tonight, reveling in the revelation of who was going home/lurking under one of those big, elaborate costumes that probably cost more to make than our monthly rent, not that it bothers us. Tonight, that meant watching the latest musical blood feud between last week’s winner The Dandelion and newcomers The UFO and The Lamp, as they duked it out for “Space Week.”
Sadly, the choice of Muse’s “Starlight” did Dandelion no favors, causing her to be eliminated in the first round, revealing the face of actor and songwriter Alicia Witt. (Series star Ken Jeong got it right, revealing, we can only imagine, an near-encyclopedic knowledge of the ’90s sitcom Cybil.) Lamp’s choice of “Venus” by Bananarama (which, fair enough, we guess), fared better, as did, annoyingly, UFO’s decision to sing “Yellow” by Coldplay, presumably because it, like, mentions the stars. (You’re The UFO! You couldn’t bust out “Space Truckin’” or something?)
The two survivors thus qualified for the evening’s climactic battle royale, closing on—what else?—a shared rendition of Elton John’s karaoke classic “Rocket Man.” With a soulful reminder that Mars is, in fact, no place to raise your kids, UFO won that one, leading Lamp to stand revealed as Melissa Joan Hart, who will now have to explain it all—by which we mean her loss on the planet’s least competitive singing competition—to her friends and loved ones. (Hart, taking what victories are now available to her: “I didn’t fall… I didn’t vomit!”) And The UFO remains a mystery, although we do know they were apparently really into the biggest radio hits of 2000.
