On Friday’s “Real Time,” Bill Maher had plenty of jokes about Queen Elizabeth II of the United Kingdom, who died Thursday at 96. And in addition to those (pretty funny) jokes, he also wondered if her death means the end of the deferential reverence British citizens have for her.
“You all know the big story. Sad day for inbreeding,” Maher joked as he pretended to bow his head in a show of respect. “Queen Elizabeth died at 96, they say the cause of death was Meghan Markle’s podcast.”
“I like the queen, I do. Her personal estate they say was almost half a billion dollars, used to be worth a billion. That’s what you get for listening to Matt Damon,” Maher continued, referring to Damon’s hilariously ill-timed Super Bowl ads for cryptocurrency brokers.
“The White House is saying for a long time they didn’t know if Biden was gonna go to the funeral. Finally said just a few hours ago he is. I was not in doubt. Biden? Funeral? It’s like when the dog hears your keys,” Maher added. “No, Biden sent his condolences to the people of England and said ‘if we can do anything, we’re here to be your friend.’ And Trump also sent condolences and said he could bury her in his golf course if they want.
“Condolences are coming in from all over, of course the British people, very upset. This is — Elton John is writing a new song, it’s called ‘Mustard in the Fridge.’ Well, he’s noting the fact that Diana was 36 and the Queen is almost 100, mustard in the fridge. Seems to me you lived your life like mustard in the fridge,” Maher said, parodying John’s song “Candle in the Wind,” originally about Marilyn Monroe and rewritten as a tribute to Princess Diana after her 1997 death.
“We’re all upset. I called Buckingham Palace to give my condolences, they said: ‘New Queen, who dis?” Maher cracked.
Later in the show during the panel guest portion, Maher revisited the topic. “I made lots of jokes about the Queen. I noticed, whenever if was a British person, even the ones you see who are kind of classic, Sharon Osborne was here once, Piers Morgan, Andrew Sullivan. The British people, it’s not funny. It’s like ‘nope, don’t call her the old bag.’ Whatever it’s like, ‘noooo.’ They really, even the ones who came to America, British people, they have a thing.
“My question is, is it just for this lady? I think it died with her. I think that reverence, I think she was the last one. And now, the monarchy, I’m not gonna say it’s going away, but I think that ‘no don’t say anything about her,’ I think that’s gonna go,” he said.
Watch the whole monologue above now.
