Listen. I am a Taylor Swift fan. Saw her in Vegas and I have tickets for LA. When I read the news about her breakup with Joe Alwyn, I texted three different people. So believe me when I say I have no hate in my heart for the fandom, but seriously guys, this is a streeeeeeetch.
Alwyn, a low-key actor who, by all reports, treated Swift very well during their six-year relationship, isn’t super active on social media and is very private about his personal life, forcing Swifties to do what they do best to fill in the gaps: read way too much into every little thing.
This week, it’s a picture posted by Emma Laird, Alwyn’s co-star in The Brutalist, which is currently filming. Laird included Alwyn in a round-up of pics from March that she posted on April 18 (looks like film, so, assuming it took a couple of weeks to get developed unless it’s just a good filter). Certain TikTokers immediately started speculating that Ms. Laird was somehow responsible for Swift’s breakup, which sadly resulted in a flurry of misogynistic responses, ridiculous rumor-mongering, and overall immaturity that seemingly forced Laird to turn off her comments. Like, what is Alwyn supposed to do, never speak to another woman again?
But anyway, the other “controversial” part of the picture is the prop Alwyn is posing with: A green Lime scooter.
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You know, a scooter. LIKE SCOOTER BRAUN, SWIFT’S NEMESIS!!!!!!!!!
ICYMI, Braun is a music exec who counts Demi Lovato and Justin Bieber among his management clients. Swift once claimed she was subjected to “incessant, manipulative bullying” by Braun and his purchase of her master recordings prompted Swift’s longest, most iconic scheme to date: re-recording all her old albums (slay). In the video for “The Man,” written and directed by Swift, there is a “no scooter” sign that fans have interpreted as a diss against Braun, which seems reasonable given the pop star’s penchant for literal symbolism. Anyways, stream “Vigilante Shit.”
