“Your sexting partner isn’t there with you, so they only have your words and their imagination to figure out what’s going on,” Corrado says. “If you’re describing to them the ways that you’re touching yourself, make it a sensory experience.” According to Corrado, you want the person you’re sexting to feel as if they’re right there, seeing, feeling, hearing, smelling, and tasting it all.
5. It can make for a great first date or foreplay.
Even if you’ve yet to meet IRL, a few rounds of sexting will give you an idea of what your “lover’s seduction learning style” is, according to O’Reilly. It’s in these cases that you can really cater to your partner and their exact desires by crafting “messages that make them feel sexy, desired, curious, excited, relaxed, challenged, loved, nervous, catered to, enticed, and more,” she says. “Take advantage of the variety of options including photos, videos, voice notes, text, GIFs, and live chats.”
It’s also ideal for foreplay with a partner if you want to get them all hot and bothered in anticipation for when you’ll see them next.
6. It creates and builds intimacy.
If we allow ourselves to be vulnerable in the way that’s necessary when sharing sexual fantasies, intimacy automatically comes with the territory.
“If done right, sexting can add intimacy to a trusting, committed relationship because it is based on communication, and the more you communicate, the closer you become,” says Cox. “When you sext, you naturally open up to your partner, sharing fantasies, listening to, and maybe acting, on their desires, making them feel wanted, trying new things together, and being vulnerable. It shows that you trust them with your innermost sexual thoughts and raw photos.”
7. It helps you embrace your own sexuality.
Although human sexuality is complicated, the fact remains that we’re sexual beings. But where things can get difficult for people is if they’ve yet to embrace that sexuality. Everyone hits their sexual bloom at different times; if we take a moment to look inside ourselves, dig around, and see what’s there, we’re likely to be surprised—in a good way. Sexting can help unlock the door to that.
We all have sexual fantasies. Even if you’ve yet to explore them, they’re there. So if you’re looking to dip your toes in those waters, sexting is a chance to do that. “It’s completely normal for all of us to have fantasies,” says Sinclair. “Sexting is the perfect opportunity to share that you want to be tied up, want to tie your partner up, experiment with role playing, or try double penetration.” Who knows—maybe after you’ve mastered sexting you’ll be more open to reading our guides on how to squirt, anal sex 101, or new sex positions if you weren’t before.
How much sexting is too much sexting?
Yes, it absolutely is possible to have too much of a good thing. It’s important to realize that you can overdo it on the sexting pics, the sexting emojis, the sexting ideas—basically, all the sexting. And you definitely don’t want that to happen.
