Jimmy Fallon is as frustrated waiting for something to happen, or not happen, with Donald Trump’s legal situation as a lot of you likely are, and in his monologue on Friday’s “The Tonight Show,” he compared it to it when someone goes into labor and then 4 days later still hasn’t had the baby.
Fallon got to that joke by running through several of Trump’s more recent outbursts. “I don’t know if you guys saw this, but late last night Trump threatening the Manhattan District Attorney, saying that if he’s charged, ‘death and destruction’ could follow. Americans said, ‘no way that’s only gonna happen if they ban TikTok,” Fallon joked.
“Yep, ‘death and destruction.’ It sounds bad, but he makes the same threat when Little Caesar’s forgets his crazy bread,” Fallon continued.
“That’s right, it’s day 4 of Trump indictment watch 2023,” Fallon went on, “and still nothing. It feels like one of those viral videos that says ‘wait for it,’ and in two minutes you’re like, ‘I don’t know if I’m gonna wait any more.”
“4 days. 4 days. Basically we all went into labor, and 4 days later we’re still chewing on ice chips,” Fallon added. (This is a reference to the fact that during labor women typically aren’t allowed to eat anything, so they chew on ice.)
“Meanwhile,” Fallon said, changing the topic, “I heard that Melania Trump is still angry at her husband over the Stormy Daniels scandal, and doesn’t sympathize with him for facing charges. That’s shocking given how warm and affectionate she and Donald are in public.”
“You can tell Melania is mad because for the last 3 nights Donald has been sleeping on the golden futon,” Fallon said. Then Fallon noted how Florida Governor Ron DeSantis said he wouldn’t be willing to serve as Trump’s Vice President, prompting Fallon to joke, “that’s shocking given how warm and affectionate they are in public.”
“I think it’s a good decision, because Don and Ron doesn’t sound like leaders of the free world. Sounds like twin brothers on TikTok,” he added.
You can watch the entire monologue at the top of the page now.